Today, on the way to a tutoring appointment in San Jose, I had a brief altercation with one of San Jose's "finest." On my way to the library, I merged off of 280 using the Alum Rock exit. At the end of the off ramp is a traffic light; it was red, and I intended to turn right. I stop, look to my left and recognize a cop car. I consider waiting for it to pass, but after calculating the speed of his car and the distance, I judge that I have adequate time to turn onto the street. So, I do.
Alum Rock is a two lane street, and I am now situated in the right lane. The police officer speeds up behind me at the following red light, merges sharply to the left, and aligns his car with mine. I look over to find out why he is driving erratically, and he indicates that I should roll down my window, which I do.
"At a red light you cannot turn right without stopping first," he says as if I am ignorant to the ways of driving.
"Uh huh," I say because there isn't anything else to say.
"You didn't come to a complete stop."
"I did."
It's probably a good thing that I was wearing sunglasses, because the sentiment behind those innocuous two words was "You are a fucktard for thinking I am going to fall for that bullshit." I have no doubt my facial expression conveyed my utter disdain for this man.
After this delightful dalliance into the realm of conversation, the light turns green. He looks at me one last time and sighs resignedly as if to say, "Whatever," rolls his window up, and zooms off.
What did he expect?
Pulling beside the lithe, blond's car, he asserts his power by indicating she roll her window down. She does. Sensually removing her sunglasses in one fell swoop, she gazes into his eyes as if to say, "Command me, Officer." He points out her follies patiently, and appropriately, she looks crestfallen. Eager to make up her shortcomings in the face of such masculinity, she thanks him profusely, her voice husky from holding back all but a single tear.
"Oh, Officer, thank you so much. I never would have known I'd done anything wrong if it weren't for you. Thank goodness you pointed it out to me so that someone else won't take advantage of me."
"Not a problem," he replies debonairly, "You just be sure to follow those traffics laws."
"Oh, I will Officer!"
And with the last melodic tones of her voice trailing behind him, our hero accelerates into the sunset filled with the pleasure of doing a good deed.
I am more than happy to disappoint. Nothing pisses me off more than a misuse of power.
